Is my brain turning to mush, or am I only dreaming... do you feel the same?

I've been moping for a day. I can't get out of first gear on my Saturday. I've come off surviving a seriously stressful week at school, and I would just love to get on with some planning and some necessary marking, but I can't engage past first gear.

I know writers have blocks... but I've had a collision - though to be fair I didn't walk into it, gravity allowed the cascading bricks to topple completely all over me. Yes, pinned down under what could quite easily be a ton of hardened earth. And I am also feeling a few twitches in my body.

I hope this state of feeling slightly more than mentally bogged down isn't causing physical manifestation too. There goes that twitch in the neck again. And why is my shoulder throbbing?

So I have decided that rather than just feeling desolate... I'd get creative and get blogging.
That you world, for being my therapist.
I have been think lots today about me 'existentialness'... what my purpose is for being here and how I am coming round to grasping it. Well at least I feel that it is in arms reach.

However, it seem to have poisened all the motivation I had this morning. I have this theory that philosophical types doen't make such great systematic teachers! Well, at least this one doesn't.
I am too easily distracted during repetitive tasks, and crave the chance to be thinking and being actively engaged.

I would love to analyse what part of me it is that causes this: Chemical imbalances in the brain (for example, testosterone?), my upbringing (the many locations I called home), or the lack of a clear vision for my career ( yes, I am a teacher, but this is so problematic, because it has always been shrouded in a romanitc and metaphysical bubble, despite all the efforts reality has taken to burst it with the sense of formality and conformity).

The bottom line is, I have always been much better at asking the questions than answering them. And a good number of those questions have been self-reflesive, attemtping to improve my situation, improve my outlook on the situation, and ultimately prove to myself that I can find the way to move forward.